My Life; Innocence Lost

When I was twenty four I was in a certain city doing military duty. I thought I might try my hand at getting a career started in showbiz so I met some guy who made promises. This was for an adult film Well eitherway I went to the 'studio' and right away I felt something wasn't right. Eitherway they told me to come in and to get undressed and my costar a beautiful girl I was shown a picture of was waiting in the back room. As you know I couldn't wait. Well I got undressed and ran back to the back room. Well next I felt a clunk on my head and I went straight to the floor. When I woke up I was chained to the bed with my hands chained to the head board and my legs spread chained to two posts. Three dudes were standing there naked and wearing masks. Oh the camera was there ready to film all of the action. Well the first guy climbed on top of me and shoved his dang cock into me! I screamed bloody murder and finally one of the other guys came over and gagged me with some red ball with a rope attached. He finally came inside me and I could feel it running down my ass with what I later found to be blood. Well they took their turns fucking me and cumming inside me, and then when they finished they sat down to watch the video and laugh at my discomfort. They made me watch too giving me pointers on how I could make my performance  better. After that all three of them fucked me again (I just can't bring myself to use the R word, which really what it was) then they dragged me off the bed took me down these stairs and hustled me into a car. They dropped me off butt naked on some side of town til I was picked up by the police and charged with indecent exposure. The only good but bad part of this is I begged them not to tie me up again. I promised I wouldn't be a problem and would do whatever they said. so if you run across the video, and it seems like I'm smiling and having a good time, know I was threatened with something horrible if I didn't cooperate. How humiliating it was walking down the street butt naked with jizz leaking out of my ass.  The news was all over the base and I was mortified.  Needless to say it was a horrible night. Well that video is probably making it's rounds still somewhere and I've just learned to live with it. So I wouldn't be so embarrassed by it, I became purposely involved with a guy and demanded we make videos and I even passed some out so as to minimize my shame.lol.  Just couldn't deal with the fact that I had gotten set up good and couldn't defend myself. I got the idea from Madonna. So you'll probably run across some. Don't try to blackmail me if you do coz I'll have some others made one day. No I never thought of myself as gay but  this is what happened. Eitherway I was involved with a guy for about five years and when we broke up I was sad coz' I'd actually started to really care about him. I saw him again about three years ago and just for old time sakes we spent the night together.lol He came so hard inside me I hate to admit it just excited me. It took almost an hour for it to all drip out after we were finished(after about four sessions) and time for him to clean me out.  He was happy, and admittedly so was I.
I tried to pass this off as a made up story but it happened. I put this out coz' of all this coming forward by women about things that happened to them in the distant past. I know a lot of them would disagree with me, their emotions are a wreck, but nobody went to jail for wht they did to me. I never found out who did it and my advice to them is to move on. Destroying these men's lives, if these stories are true will solve nothing, except maybe increase the murder rate so that they don't have to worry about their victims coming back to testify. and then we truly have no way of knowing that these charges are true. They probably are but I still believe you should have substantive evidence to convict a person of a crime. Unless they have a video, some pictures, witnesses, or some police reports or something They really should have just kept quiet about it. Now the next soceiopaths out there doing these kind of things, they will kill their victims, or if they're rich like these guys are, will have them killed. Somtimes, shit happens and you just have to be thankful they didn't kill you too.

My Life; My Life

The boss says that people are mad at me because of my comments about gay marriage. Lemme ask am I not allowed to have my own opinion? Sorry if you don't agree but I have my own opinions and I will keep them. Try an understand; if not I will live.
I'm busy preparing for our vacation and my husband will be home in a few moments here. He went and bought some new swimwear and he has to model for me!lol I gotta see this first.lol. Coz you all might not get to see this!lol Might have to keep this to myself!lol I mean he already turns heads every time we step out, so now, call me insecure, but I gotta protect my space.lol And forget it; I will NEVER NEVER NEVER EVER POST A PICTURE OF HIM ON THIS BLOG!!! AND I WILL NEVER TELL YOU WHERE WE LIVE!!!lol Got enough competition here, don't need anymore online!lol
I'm gonna' tell you I don't mean to brag, coz; there are evil spirits that seem to come out with bragging, but I haven't really been 'happy' in a long time. For many years it was rough. I mean I felt like that old hee haw song  if it wasn't for bad luck I'd have no luck at all!lol I felt like Charlie Brown where when he went out trick or treating, all of his friends got candy and he always got a rock. Well I felt like when people opened the door to give me the rock, instead of putting it in the bag they threw it at me and busted me in the head.lol One time I had a dream where I was trick or treating and every time they opened a door they threw a rock and busted me in the head. At one house I just said ' can you do something else besides hit me in the head with a rock?' And the guy said 'sure! Turn around and bend over!' Then I said 'just give me the rock.' I mean that's how bad I felt at the time. Then I met my husband, an I was just expecting another one night affair. Like I said, he insisted on romancing me.lol I wore that red dress he bought for me, expecting something kinky that night, but he threw his arms around me later that night, picked me up and twirled me around.lol Wasn't expecting that. He did feel me up but then he kissed me and took me home. I complained about his music coz' he was listening to country, then he asked me what I liked, and I told him the smiths, a band from England. Well on our next date he handed me a smiths cd.lol Then he thought he was clever. He asked me my favorite smiths song.  I won't say here coz' some things need to stay private, but I told him and he was soo impressed.  Then he asked me to sing it for him, and so I gave him a mini recital. I didn't just sing that one but two others for him. Then I said with a smirk, 'believe me now?'lol. He just smiled and said yeahhhlol Ironically, I like country music now, especially Keith Urban and Kane Brown.
But basically it's good when you meet somebody who honestly wants to know you the person.  Not just fuck you, but know you; what you like what you don't like, if you don't mind wearing a little red dress for him stuff like that. Coz for the longest time all I saw was one relationship after another disintegrate. I spent more time alone than I did involved with anyone. It's good to lay down with someone every night and know that they love you.

My Life; Vacation

My husband is taking me on a vacation to Florida. This is great coz' I've never been to Florida. It's odd coz' I've been many places in the U.S. but never made my way to Florida. I find that kind of strange but I'm glad that we're going. I look forward to some time on the beach and getting as naked as I legally can. Now we'll forget all of the racism that seems to go on down there and just have some fun. There are some nude beaches I want to go to also. I don't spend all this time in the gym for nother.lol I want others to see what they're missing out on.lol My husband spends a lot of time in the gym too. The women just drool all over him and I just laugh coz' he's mine!lol Yes I'm terrible.lol But I'm glad to finally be going to Florida. I love going to the beach. That's what I like about .Mexico. At least Mexico is nothing but water. I thought it was desert, but I was shocked to find that they built Mexico City on a bunch of flotillas. It was crazy.
Well after this trip my next push is for Hawaii!lol Yes I love the beach life. P.us my husband is so handsome when he strips down to his speeos. He looks absolutely awesome. I work out fanatically so people won't say, look at that broke down guy standing next to that handsome He Man.lol I have a little weight problem so I have to work out daily to keep it down. Of course my husband says I'm fine, but I'm not taking any chances. Dudes are always trying to get his attention coz' I hate to say it but gays really don't have respect for marriage. I mean they say they want it, but then they keep trying to interfere. At least we're not married in the traditional sense. I mean we both agreed that marriage is a contract between a man and a woman before God, coz' we know how the Big Guy feels about same sex relationships. We have a Civil Servvice agreement that's equivalent and legally binding as a marriage. So in the eyes of the law we're legally married.
Lol. life can be complicated.. But I look forward to this beach. I've lost some more weight and look absolutely awesome in my bathing suit.lol We'll be back in time to celebrate C hristmas. Wonder what my husband got me?lol